My neighbor didn’t get too worked up realizing that this was a fixable mistake. I actually helped to disconnect the hoses, and drain the mixture of oil and gas. I felt some worth in buying more oil, reattaching the hoses and filling the correct tanks the next day, (all successfully on my own). But through this situation, I experienced great moments of anxiety, self-condemnation, and realized I really needed some help. 1 Peter 5:7 pointed me in the right direction.
I realized that I am not an expert in many things (if any) but that is ok, God still can and does use me. It is often through our mistakes that God does his biggest work in us. At the point when failure or uncertainty touches our lives and we feel discouraged or afraid, turn to Him for help, and He will build you back up. God, through His word and presence in our lives, encourages us like no other can, and sets us out with new vigor for another task.
Also, most of us stay away from doing things that are foreign to us because we might fail, break something, do something wrong, etc. Sometimes admitting your limitation in a certain area is a good thing! However, if we always take the approach of staying where we are comfortable, there will never be anything new, nothing ever to really peak our attention, stretch our comfort zone, and consequently, limit the opportunity of realizing that God just did something through me.
This tractor incident to taught me the power of “Casting all of our anxiety on Him.” If your situation of life today is causing you anxiety, cast it to Jesus. He cares for you and is capable of helping you through the current difficulty that you face. At times, we might even feel anxiety over following the instructions of Jesus who asks us to be His ambassadors. Does inviting someone to church, sharing your faith with someone else, or giving beyond what is comfortable, etc., etc. cause you to get sweaty hands or a knot in your stomach? Go ahead and breathe. Apply this verse to your life because Jesus not only cares about you, He cares about all his creation, including those who don’t know Him as their Savior and Lord.
In the situation with the tractor, it took me several days to come to this realization and overcome feelings of inadequacies that I placed upon myself. Somehow, God was able to turn my anxiety into a realization of not only His care, but also His power; and I walked away feeling blessed from the whole experience. If you are struggling with some kind of anxiety today, share it with Jesus because He understands. If you feel the Lord asking you to step out for Him in some way, but you haven’t yet because you are anxious, give the anxiety all to Him and proceed in His love.